Overflow
The external demands of my life and work are not what they were a decade ago when I was navigating intense grief while leading a community-focused downtown church. And yet I often feel that my need for sacred rest is even greater than it was back then.
One way I’ve explained this to myself is to humorously suggest that my “breaker switch” is lower than it used to be. When I was running full steam ahead and in survival mode, I told myself I got used to higher stress and was better able to operate on an empty tank. But really, who was I fooling?
About 25 years ago, I was blessed by a season of spiritual direction with Ron Delbene, a well-known author, poet, artist, and Episcopal priest who was serving an interim in the city where I was appointed to the staff of a large congregation. My three children were young, and I was struggling to do it all. In one memorable session, Ron told me, “You can only truly give from your overflow.” And for years I carried that quote in my heart (he told me it was by Meister Elkhart).
When I began to create The Art of WellBeing a few years ago, I googled the quote and the author, never to find anything like it by Meister Eckhart. Yet, the invitation to give from overflow remained in my soul and drew me into a renewed practice of contemplative prayer—which I envisioned as receiving inflow to fill the well.
Another influence for this imagery is Richard Rohr’s description of the Trinity as a water wheel: “The Franciscan philosopher, theologian, and mystic St. Bonaventure described the Trinity as a ‘fountain of fullness’ of overflowing love. Picture three buckets on a moving water wheel. We can see these water wheels in rural areas of Europe. They usually have more than three buckets, but each bucket empties out and swings back, inevitably waiting to be filled again. And it always is! Most of us can’t risk letting go or emptying out. We can risk letting go because we aren’t sure we will be refilled. But the three Persons of the Trinity empty themselves and pour themselves out into each other. Each knows they can empty themselves because they will forever be refilled. To understand this mystery of love fully, we need to ‘stand under’ the flow and participate in it. It’s infinite outpouring and infinite infilling without end. It can only be experienced as a flow, as a community, as a relationship, as an inherent connection.”
Like many of us, I struggle to quiet my mind in contemplative prayer. The rhythmic image of mutual giving and receiving in the movement of the water well has been my sacred word for focus during the past couple of years as I renewed my practice of listening prayer.
If you would like to begin this practice, I encourage you to begin with a tiny amount of time rather than the often prescribed 20-minute minimum. In the beginning, I tried for five minutes. Then I jumped to 12 minutes when one of my coaching clients told me she’d read that neuroscience suggests 12 minutes as the minimum to receive neurological benefits. This client also introduced me to a wonderful app by Contemplative Outreach called “Centering Prayer.” This year during Lent, nearly two years after committing again to the regular, daily practice of listening prayer, I finally increased my time of silent stillness to 20 minutes. And when I simply cannot get my mind to be still, I shift to contemplative walks—with no phone calls, music, podcasts, or audible books. As I move my body, I listen and receive.
I have a hunch that my greater need for sacred rest today compared to 10 years ago is not unique to me. As the pace of change in our world increases, as the onslaught of information rises, as our practice of constant connectivity holds us hostage, we all need more than ever to practice rest, stillness, receiving, inflow, silence, stillness, letting go, meditation, and solitude.
Join us for the single group coaching session on April 20 at 1 pm for more resources and idea-sharing about practicing sacred rest. You are not alone in your need for sacred rest.
“If you aren’t resting, you are a slave to something.” - Adele Calhoun
What is one new way you can downshift and rest each day?
What might happen in your work if you practiced “only giving from your overflow?”
What kind of rest do you need to flourish in the life of giving and serving you desire?